Luca Turin is the world’s most famous perfume critic and a scientist. Together with his wife, Tania Sanchez, he wrote a book about perfumes, compiled out of copious amount of perfume reviews named Perfumes, the A-Z guide. Every perfume is rated from one to five stars, one meaning that perfume is a total failure and should be avoided…and five stars meaning it’s a masterpiece. In this article I present you all perfumes that got one star, and are considered worst perfumes ever. Soon there will be another book by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez that will cover all perfumes launched in the meantime. I highly recommend you to check their amazing book, it’s very (sc)entertaining and more than informative. Marked blue (links) are my reviews of mentioned perfumes.

212 – Carolina Herrera : harsh floral

212 Sexy Men – Carolina Herrera : musky oriental

1872 for Women – Clive Christian : green floral

A

Acaciosa – Caron : soapy floral

Acqua di Sale – Profumum : helional alone

Adidas Moves 0:01 – Adidas : green woody

Adventure – Gant : watery citrus

Aki – Tann Rokka : floral mess

Alamut – Lorenzo Villoresi : hideous oriental

Alba – Profumum : hazelnut coffee

Allure Homme – Chanel : woody amber

Allure Homme Sport – Chanel : spicy citrus

Allure Homme Sport Cologne – Chanel : woody citrus

Almost Bare – Bobbie Brown : chemical floral

Amarige – Givenchy : killer tuberose

Amarige Mariage – Givenchy : prune candyfloss

Amazing Grace –Philosphy: generic muguet

Ambre de Cabochard – Gres : Chemical fruitcake

Ambrette 9 – Le Labo : cheap musk

Amethyst  – Olivier Durbano : pepper pine

Amour pour Homme – Cacharel : woody amber

Andy Warhol Union Square – Bond No. 9 : lemony floral

Ange ou Demon– Givency : floral oriental

Anglomania – Vivienne Westwood : dessert woody

Aqua Allegoria Cherry Blossom – Guerlain: chemical floral

Aqua Allegoria Grosellina – Guerlain: dire fruity

Aqua Allegoria Lemon Fresca – Guerlain: flat lemon

Aqua Allegoria Pivoine Magnifica – Guerlain: nasty floral

Aqua Allegoria Tiare Mimosa – Guerlain: not either

Aqua Allegoria Tutti Kiwi – Guerlain: not kiwi

Aquawoman  – Rochas: watery floral

Armani Code Elixir de Parfum – Armani : sugared floral

Armani Code for Woman – Armani : candy floral

Art of Perfumery 1 – Art of Perfumery : metallic citrus

Art of Perfumery 2 – Art of Perfumery : herbal clogne

Art of Perfumery 3 – Art of Perfumery : white floral

Art of Perfumery 5 – Art of Perfumery : hay rose

Art of Perfumery 7 – Art of Perfumery : woody rose

Atlas Cedar – Jean – Charles Brosseau : peppery woody

Atman – Phat farm : cheap amber

Avatar – Coty: crap fougere

B

Baby Grace – Philosophy : mimosa musk

Baldessarini Ambre – Hugo Boss : crap amber

Balmya – Balmain: fruity floral

B de Boucheron – Boucheron: canned fruit

b.e. – Becker Eshaya: fruity amber

Beat – Rimmel: Alize belch

Beauty Rush Appletini – Victoria’s Secret: Jolly Rancher

Beckham Signature Women – Coty: fruity varnish

Belong – celine Dion: Fruity amber

Bergamote 22 – Le Labo: light green

Bill Blass Couture 8 – Bill Blass : fruity floral

Black XS – Paco Rabanne  : woody amber

Bleecker Street – Bond No. 9 : green watery

Bluebell – Penhaligon’s : hideous floral

Bobbi – Bobbi Brown : fruity floral

Bond Girl 007 – Avon: musky cedar

Boudoir – Vivienne Westwood : rose chypre

Boudoir Sin Garden – Vivienne Westwood : anemic floral

Breathe – Fresh Scents by Terri : floral musk

Bright Crystal – Versace: nasty floral

Brooks Brothers Classic – Brooks Brothers : masculine cliche

Brooks Brothers New York Ladies – Brooks Brothers : vile floral

B*United Jeans Man –Benetton : watery citrus

Burberry London – Burberry : floral abomination

Burberry London for Man Special Edition 2008 – Burberry : linden lavender

Burberry London for Woman Special Edition 2008– Burberry : acid floral

C

Cabotine – Gres : nasty floral

Cacharel pour l’Homme – Cacharel : nutmeg citrus

Can Can;

Carnation – Mona di Orio: Floral oriental

Carthusia Uomo – Carthusia : citrus woody

Cast a Spell – Lulu Guinness : mini Angel

Central Park – Bond No. 9 : menthol rub

C’est la Fete – Christian Lacroix : very fruity

CH – Carolina Herrera : pepper strawberry

Champs-Elysees – Guerlain: fluorescent floral

Chance Eau Fraiche – Chanel : chemical floral

Charlie! – Revlon : green floral

China Rose – Floris : syrupy “rose”

Chrome – Azzaro : watery citrus

Ciel – Amouage : bad floral

Cirrus – Amouage : fruity woody

cK IN2U Her– Calvin Klein : fruity amber

cK IN2U His– Calvin Klein : 7UP amber

Clean – Clean : passionfruit citrus

Clean FFresh Laundry – Clean : lime musk

Clean Lather – Clean : un clean

Clean Man – Clean : messy citrus

Clean Provence – Clean : citrus musk

Clean Shower Fresh – Clean : trash floral

Clean Ultimate – Clean : citrus floral

Clean Warm Cotton – Clean : citrus floral

Confetto – Profumum: hand lotion

Coriandre– Jean Couturier: rose chypre

Crystal Noir – Versace: white floral

Cuir Amethyste – Armani Prive: leather violet

Cumbia Colors Man – Benetton : cheap shampoo

Cumbia Colors Woman – Benetton : sour flower

Curious – Britney Spears: syrupy floral

D

Daliflor – Salvador Dali: fruity floral

Delices eau de Toilette – Cartier : vile fruity

Delices parfum – Cartier : fruity vile

Design – Paul Sebastian : fruity shampoo

Desir de Rochas Femme – Rochas : bleached rose

Desir de Rochas Homme – Rochas : woody nothing

Desire Blue – Dunhill: sugary soapy

Diamonds – Armani : raspberry vanilla

Domain – Mary Kay : fresh fougere

Do Son – Diptyque : alleged tuberose

Dream – Fresh Scents by Terri: dry floral

Duro – Nasomatto : woody amber

E

Eau de Lierre – Diptyque : watered gin

Eau de Noho;

Eau de Rubylips – Salvador Dali : sour floral

Eau de Shalimar – Guerlain : cheap oriental

Eau du Soir – Sisley: cheap chypre

Echo – Davidoff : woody citrus

Echo Woman – Davidoff : screechy floral

Effusion Man – Iceberg : pele orange

Elige – Mary Kay : sour floral

Emeraude – Coty : cheap oriental

Energy Woman – United Colors of Benetton : citrus fruity

Erolfa – Creed : woody melon

Essence of Man – United Colors of Benetton : shampoo citrus

Essence of Woman – United Colors of Benetton : white floral

Essential – Lacoste : citrus woody

Euphoria Men – Calvin Klein : nondescript

F

Fairy Dust – Paris Hilton : Fruity terror

Farnesiana – Caron : floral woody

Fig Tea – Parfums de Nikolai : fruit nightmare

Fiore d’Ambra – Profumum : nauseating amber

Fleur d’Oranger 27 – Le Labo : cologne ripoff

Fleurs d’Ombre Jasmin Lilas – Jean – Charles Brosseau : cheap floral

Flowerbomb – Victor & Rolf : sugary floral

Fool for Love – Ego Facto : spice floral

Forever Elizabeth – Elizabeth Taylor  : stale wreath

French Cancan – Caron  : sweet floral

G

Gardenia – Chanel : not gardenia

Gardenia – Elizabeth Taylor  : note gardenia

Garofano – Lorenzo Villoresi  : carnation booze

Gaultier2 – Jean Paul Gaultier: sweet milky

Ghost Cherish – Ghost  : metallic floral

Golden Goddess – Baby Path  : fruity floral

Gold Man– United Colors of Benetton  : hissy patchouli

Gold Woman – United Colors of Benetton  : fruity mess

Gramercy Park – Bond No. 9  : green soap

Guess man – Guess  : chemical fresh

Guess Woman – Guess  : imitation tea

H

Hamptons – Bond No. 9  : oily woody

Heiress – Paris Hilton : fruity floral

Higher Energy – Dior : citrus sport

Hiris – Hermes : sad iris

Honey I Washed the Kids – LUSH : orange vanilla

Hugo XX – Hugo Boss : thin floral

I

Iceberg Homme – Iceberg : sad shampoo

Iceberg Twice Man – Iceberg : fruity woody

Ichnusa – Profumum : cheap fig

Individuel– Mont Blanc : citrus green

Inspiration – Lacoste : sad florist

Irisia – Creed : green chypre

Island Bermuda – Michael Kors : beyond purgatory

J

Jade – Olivier Durbano : moutwash fruity

Jaipur Saphir –Boucheron : gum ball

Jamais le Dimanche – Ego Facto : marine dreck

Le Jasmin  – Chantecaille : metallic jasmine

Jasmin 17 – Le Labo : cucumber jasmine

Jean Paul Gaultier “Classique” Eau d’Ete– Jean Paul Gaultier : light citrus

Jean Paul Gaultier “Classique”Eau de Toilette – Jean Paul Gaultier : fruit oriental

Jil Sander Style – Jil Sander : woody floral

Joop! Go – Joop! : citrus rosy

Just Cavalli Her – Roberto Cavalli : airline sweets

Just me – Paris Hilton : barf – bag floral

Just Me for Man – Paris Hilton : sad sack

K

Keep it Fluffy – B Never To Busy to Be Beautiful : creamsicle musk

Kingdom – Alexander McQueen : heavy cumin

L

L –  Apothia : allegedly iris

Laguna Homme – Salvador Dali : trashoid oriental

L.A. Style – Mary – Kate and Ashley : cut – rate Angel

Lauren Style – Ralph Lauren : white floral

Light Blue – Dolce & Gabbana : citrus “amber”

Light Blue pour Homme – Dolce & Gabbana : marine woody

Light Comes  from Within – Creative Scentualization : soapy floral

Little Italy – Bond No. 9 : animalic Valencia

Lotos Blossom & Water Lily – Jo Malone : harsh floral

Loukhoum – Keiko Mecheri : powdery candy

Love in Black – Creed : iris cucumber

Love in white – Creed : burial wreath

Lulu – Fresh Scents by Terry : muguet musk

Lulu Guinness – Lulu Guiness : half pint

Lux – Mona di Oro : dire citrus

Lys – Parfums 06130 : marine citrus

M

Marc Jacobs Man – Marc Jacobs : sad fig

Mauboussin Homme – Mauboussin : woody oriental

Mayotte – Guerlain : nasty floral

Mechant Loup – L”Artisan Parfumeur : watery herbaceous

Mediterranean – Elizabeth Arden : fresh floral

Michael – Michael Kors : evil tuberose

Midnight Poison– Dior : woody oriental

Miel de Bois– Serge Lutens : animalic floral

Miss Boucheron – Boucheron : fruity floral

Miss Rocaille – Caron : sour peony

Miss Sixty –Coty : cheap candy

Montana Mood Sexy – Montana : not tonight

Montana Mood Soft – Montana : light oriental

Moragan de Toi – Moragan : penny candy

Must de Cartier – Cartier : Russian chocolate

My Dream – Gres : white floral

N

Nanette Lepore – Nanette Lepore : fruity death

New York Fling – Bond No. 9 : floral thingy

Nuit Noire – Mona di Orio : floral animalic

N.Y Chic – Mary-Kate and Ashly : grapefruit handsoap

O

Oh Baby – Fresh Scent by Terri  : soap floral

Oiro – Mona di Orio : floral oriental

Omnia Green Jade – Bulgari : fruity musky

O Oui! – Lancome : overexposed floral

Original Santal – Creed : sweet oriental

Original Vetiver – Creed : unoriginal woody

P

Le Parfum – Lalique : rock bottom

Paris Hilton – Paris Hilton : silly floral

Pasha – Cartier: aromatic fougere

Passion –Elizabeth Taylor : fog horn

Pi – Givanchy : sweet nothing

Piegge a Filles – Ego Facto : disgusting musk

Pink Beach – Victoria’s Secret : canned fruit

Poeme – Lancome : horrid floral

Polo Black – Ralph Lauren : sage lavender

Polo Blue – Ralph Lauren : citrus woody

Pour Monsieur Concentre – Chanel : sweetened chypre

Princess – Vera Wang : tooth decay

Private Collection Amber Ylang Ylang – Estee Lauder : vanilla syrup

Provocative Woman – Elizabeth Arden : citrus floral

Pure Purple – Hugo Boss : cherry syrup

Pure Sport for Men – Benetton : no fragrance

Pure Sport for Woman – Benetton : undetectable floral

Purple Fantasy – Guerlain : citrus floral

Pursuit – Dunhill : spicy sporty

R

Reflection – Amouage : white floral

Reflection Man – Amouage : woody vanilla

Remix for Her – Armani : fruity floral

Rock’n Rose – Valentino : fruity floral

Romance Eau Fraiche 2008 – Ralph Lauren : watery lemons

Romance Man – Ralph Lauren : fresh nothing

Roots Spirit – Roots : citrus musk

Roots Spirit Man – Roots :woody citrus

Roughe –Hermes : floral oriental

Royal Bain de Caron – Caron : metallic fruity

RSVP – Kenneth Kole : woody amber

Reumeur – Lanvin : white floral

S

Sacre Coeur – Ego Facto : citrus herbal

Saks Fifth Avenue for Him – Bond No. 9  : woody amber

Sea and Sun in Cadaques– Salvador Dali : metallic grapefruit

Secret Obsession – Calvin Klein : fruity wood

Secret Wish – Anna Sui : fruity floral

Selection – Hugo Boss : powdery woody

Sentiment pour Homme – Escada : spicy woody

Serge Noire – Serge Lutens : camphor clove

Serpentine – Cavalli : fruity amber

Sexy Darling – Kylie Minogue+ : floral dreck

Shanghai Butterfly – Nanette Lepore : isopropyl alcohol

Sheer Stella 2007 – Stella McCartney: sour floral

Silver Mountain Water – Creed : fresh metallic

Silver Rain – La Prairie : Angel clone

Six Scents No.2 – Six  Scents : blankety blank

Six Scents No. 4 – Six  Scents : pine citrus

Six Scents No. 5 – Six  Scents : pale stale

Six Scents No. 6 – Six  Scents : chemical green

Soir de Lune – Sisley : woody rose

Spellbound – Estee Lauder : medicated treacle

Sport – Benetton : wet weekend

Starwalker – Mont Blanc : citrus woody

Sung – Alfred Sung : jasmine diaper

Sweet Paradise – Morgan : mango syrup

T

Tabac Blond – Caron : woody floral

Thundra – Profumum : sour patchouli

Tribute – Mary Kay  : fruit bomb

Trouble – Boucheron : dismal oriental

Trouble Eau Legere – Boucheron : indigestible oriental

U

Ultraviolet – Paco Rabanne : medicinal fruity

Ultraviolet Man – Paco Rabanne : green sugary

United Colors of Benetton Man – Benetton : drone cologne

V

Valentino – Valentino : dire vanillic

Velocity – Mary Kay : fresh citrus

Velvet Rope – Apothia: fruity mess

Vent Vert – Balmain : green floral

Vera Wang for Man – Vera Wang : soapy nightmare

Versace Jeans Couture Man – Versace : woody nothing

Versace Man  Eau Fraiche – Versace : screechy citrus

Versace pour Homme – Versace : laundry musk

Very Irresistible – Givenchy : woody floral

Very Irresistible for Man – Givenchy : fresh woody

Very Irresistibile Fresh Attitude – Givenchy : woody citrus

Very Irresistibile  Sensual eau de parfum – Givenchy : woody floral

Very Sexy for Her – Victoris Secret : sour metallic

Very Sexy Hot – Victoris Secret : mango raincoat

Vetiver – Creed :  not vetiver

Vetiver Extreme – Guerlain : vetiver disaster

Voile de Jasmin – Bulgari : floral wreck

W

White Red He – Armani : woody spicy

White Red She – Armani : fruity floral

White Rose – Floris : fake rose

Wish Pink Diamond – Chopard : cherry Baileys

Wish Turquoise Diamond – Chopard: phobic floral

Wisteria – Chantecaille : Windex actually

Z

Zoe – Fresh Scents by Terri : floral musk

 

NEW PERFUME GUIDE BY LUCA TURIN 2018 IS OUT!

Top 10 list of best perfumes that came out since the first book can be found HERE.

CHECK OUT NEW TOP LISTS BY LUCA TURIN AND TANIA SANCHEZ 2018

Top list of best perfumes rated with five stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.

Top list of best perfumes rated with four stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.

CHECK OUT MORE TOP LISTS BY LUCA TURIN

Top list of best perfumes rated with five stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.

Top list of best perfumes rated with four stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.

Top list of best perfumes rated with three stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.

Top list of worst perfumes rated with two stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE

MORE TOP LISTS BY FAMOUS PERFUME CRITICS

Top 10 list of best perfumes by Chandler Burr can be found HERE.

Top 100 list of best perfumes that marked XX century by Lizzie Ostrom can be found HERE.

DO YOU KNOW WHICH PERFUMES CELEBRITIES ACTUALLY WEAR?

Favorite fragrances of celebrities : Complete list can be found HERE. Find out what perfumes celebrities actually like to wear!

And if you want to find out what Creed perfumes celebrities like to wear check the best of HERE.