Luca Turin is the world’s most famous perfume critic and a scientist. Together with his wife, Tania Sanchez, he wrote a book about perfumes, compiled out of copious amount of perfume reviews named Perfumes, the A-Z guide. Every perfume is rated from one to five stars, one meaning that perfume is a total failure and should be avoided…and five stars meaning it’s a masterpiece. In this article I present you all perfumes that got one star, and are considered worst perfumes ever. Soon there will be another book by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez that will cover all perfumes launched in the meantime. I highly recommend you to check their amazing book, it’s very (sc)entertaining and more than informative. Marked blue (links) are my reviews of mentioned perfumes.
212 – Carolina Herrera : harsh floral
212 Sexy Men – Carolina Herrera : musky oriental
1872 for Women – Clive Christian : green floral
A
Acaciosa – Caron : soapy floral
Acqua di Sale – Profumum : helional alone
Adidas Moves 0:01 – Adidas : green woody
Adventure – Gant : watery citrus
Aki – Tann Rokka : floral mess
Alamut – Lorenzo Villoresi : hideous oriental
Alba – Profumum : hazelnut coffee
Allure Homme – Chanel : woody amber
Allure Homme Sport – Chanel : spicy citrus
Allure Homme Sport Cologne – Chanel : woody citrus
Almost Bare – Bobbie Brown : chemical floral
Amarige – Givenchy : killer tuberose
Amarige Mariage – Givenchy : prune candyfloss
Amazing Grace –Philosphy: generic muguet
Ambre de Cabochard – Gres : Chemical fruitcake
Ambrette 9 – Le Labo : cheap musk
Amethyst – Olivier Durbano : pepper pine
Amour pour Homme – Cacharel : woody amber
Andy Warhol Union Square – Bond No. 9 : lemony floral
Ange ou Demon– Givency : floral oriental
Anglomania – Vivienne Westwood : dessert woody
Aqua Allegoria Cherry Blossom – Guerlain: chemical floral
Aqua Allegoria Grosellina – Guerlain: dire fruity
Aqua Allegoria Lemon Fresca – Guerlain: flat lemon
Aqua Allegoria Pivoine Magnifica – Guerlain: nasty floral
Aqua Allegoria Tiare Mimosa – Guerlain: not either
Aqua Allegoria Tutti Kiwi – Guerlain: not kiwi
Aquawoman – Rochas: watery floral
Armani Code Elixir de Parfum – Armani : sugared floral
Armani Code for Woman – Armani : candy floral
Art of Perfumery 1 – Art of Perfumery : metallic citrus
Art of Perfumery 2 – Art of Perfumery : herbal clogne
Art of Perfumery 3 – Art of Perfumery : white floral
Art of Perfumery 5 – Art of Perfumery : hay rose
Art of Perfumery 7 – Art of Perfumery : woody rose
Atlas Cedar – Jean – Charles Brosseau : peppery woody
Atman – Phat farm : cheap amber
Avatar – Coty: crap fougere
B
Baby Grace – Philosophy : mimosa musk
Baldessarini Ambre – Hugo Boss : crap amber
Balmya – Balmain: fruity floral
B de Boucheron – Boucheron: canned fruit
b.e. – Becker Eshaya: fruity amber
Beat – Rimmel: Alize belch
Beauty Rush Appletini – Victoria’s Secret: Jolly Rancher
Beckham Signature Women – Coty: fruity varnish
Belong – celine Dion: Fruity amber
Bergamote 22 – Le Labo: light green
Bill Blass Couture 8 – Bill Blass : fruity floral
Black XS – Paco Rabanne : woody amber
Bleecker Street – Bond No. 9 : green watery
Bluebell – Penhaligon’s : hideous floral
Bobbi – Bobbi Brown : fruity floral
Bond Girl 007 – Avon: musky cedar
Boudoir – Vivienne Westwood : rose chypre
Boudoir Sin Garden – Vivienne Westwood : anemic floral
Breathe – Fresh Scents by Terri : floral musk
Bright Crystal – Versace: nasty floral
Brooks Brothers Classic – Brooks Brothers : masculine cliche
Brooks Brothers New York Ladies – Brooks Brothers : vile floral
B*United Jeans Man –Benetton : watery citrus
Burberry London – Burberry : floral abomination
Burberry London for Man Special Edition 2008 – Burberry : linden lavender
Burberry London for Woman Special Edition 2008– Burberry : acid floral
C
Cabotine – Gres : nasty floral
Cacharel pour l’Homme – Cacharel : nutmeg citrus
Can Can;
Carnation – Mona di Orio: Floral oriental
Carthusia Uomo – Carthusia : citrus woody
Cast a Spell – Lulu Guinness : mini Angel
Central Park – Bond No. 9 : menthol rub
C’est la Fete – Christian Lacroix : very fruity
CH – Carolina Herrera : pepper strawberry
Champs-Elysees – Guerlain: fluorescent floral
Chance Eau Fraiche – Chanel : chemical floral
Charlie! – Revlon : green floral
China Rose – Floris : syrupy “rose”
Chrome – Azzaro : watery citrus
Ciel – Amouage : bad floral
Cirrus – Amouage : fruity woody
cK IN2U Her– Calvin Klein : fruity amber
cK IN2U His– Calvin Klein : 7UP amber
Clean – Clean : passionfruit citrus
Clean FFresh Laundry – Clean : lime musk
Clean Lather – Clean : un clean
Clean Man – Clean : messy citrus
Clean Provence – Clean : citrus musk
Clean Shower Fresh – Clean : trash floral
Clean Ultimate – Clean : citrus floral
Clean Warm Cotton – Clean : citrus floral
Confetto – Profumum: hand lotion
Coriandre– Jean Couturier: rose chypre
Crystal Noir – Versace: white floral
Cuir Amethyste – Armani Prive: leather violet
Cumbia Colors Man – Benetton : cheap shampoo
Cumbia Colors Woman – Benetton : sour flower
Curious – Britney Spears: syrupy floral
D
Daliflor – Salvador Dali: fruity floral
Delices eau de Toilette – Cartier : vile fruity
Delices parfum – Cartier : fruity vile
Design – Paul Sebastian : fruity shampoo
Desir de Rochas Femme – Rochas : bleached rose
Desir de Rochas Homme – Rochas : woody nothing
Desire Blue – Dunhill: sugary soapy
Diamonds – Armani : raspberry vanilla
Domain – Mary Kay : fresh fougere
Do Son – Diptyque : alleged tuberose
Dream – Fresh Scents by Terri: dry floral
Duro – Nasomatto : woody amber
E
Eau de Lierre – Diptyque : watered gin
Eau de Noho;
Eau de Rubylips – Salvador Dali : sour floral
Eau de Shalimar – Guerlain : cheap oriental
Eau du Soir – Sisley: cheap chypre
Echo – Davidoff : woody citrus
Echo Woman – Davidoff : screechy floral
Effusion Man – Iceberg : pele orange
Elige – Mary Kay : sour floral
Emeraude – Coty : cheap oriental
Energy Woman – United Colors of Benetton : citrus fruity
Erolfa – Creed : woody melon
Essence of Man – United Colors of Benetton : shampoo citrus
Essence of Woman – United Colors of Benetton : white floral
Essential – Lacoste : citrus woody
Euphoria Men – Calvin Klein : nondescript
F
Fairy Dust – Paris Hilton : Fruity terror
Farnesiana – Caron : floral woody
Fig Tea – Parfums de Nikolai : fruit nightmare
Fiore d’Ambra – Profumum : nauseating amber
Fleur d’Oranger 27 – Le Labo : cologne ripoff
Fleurs d’Ombre Jasmin Lilas – Jean – Charles Brosseau : cheap floral
Flowerbomb – Victor & Rolf : sugary floral
Fool for Love – Ego Facto : spice floral
Forever Elizabeth – Elizabeth Taylor : stale wreath
French Cancan – Caron : sweet floral
G
Gardenia – Chanel : not gardenia
Gardenia – Elizabeth Taylor : note gardenia
Garofano – Lorenzo Villoresi : carnation booze
Gaultier2 – Jean Paul Gaultier: sweet milky
Ghost Cherish – Ghost : metallic floral
Golden Goddess – Baby Path : fruity floral
Gold Man– United Colors of Benetton : hissy patchouli
Gold Woman – United Colors of Benetton : fruity mess
Gramercy Park – Bond No. 9 : green soap
Guess man – Guess : chemical fresh
Guess Woman – Guess : imitation tea
H
Hamptons – Bond No. 9 : oily woody
Heiress – Paris Hilton : fruity floral
Higher Energy – Dior : citrus sport
Hiris – Hermes : sad iris
Honey I Washed the Kids – LUSH : orange vanilla
Hugo XX – Hugo Boss : thin floral
I
Iceberg Homme – Iceberg : sad shampoo
Iceberg Twice Man – Iceberg : fruity woody
Ichnusa – Profumum : cheap fig
Individuel– Mont Blanc : citrus green
Inspiration – Lacoste : sad florist
Irisia – Creed : green chypre
Island Bermuda – Michael Kors : beyond purgatory
J
Jade – Olivier Durbano : moutwash fruity
Jaipur Saphir –Boucheron : gum ball
Jamais le Dimanche – Ego Facto : marine dreck
Le Jasmin – Chantecaille : metallic jasmine
Jasmin 17 – Le Labo : cucumber jasmine
Jean Paul Gaultier “Classique” Eau d’Ete– Jean Paul Gaultier : light citrus
Jean Paul Gaultier “Classique”Eau de Toilette – Jean Paul Gaultier : fruit oriental
Jil Sander Style – Jil Sander : woody floral
Joop! Go – Joop! : citrus rosy
Just Cavalli Her – Roberto Cavalli : airline sweets
Just me – Paris Hilton : barf – bag floral
Just Me for Man – Paris Hilton : sad sack
K
Keep it Fluffy – B Never To Busy to Be Beautiful : creamsicle musk
Kingdom – Alexander McQueen : heavy cumin
L
L – Apothia : allegedly iris
Laguna Homme – Salvador Dali : trashoid oriental
L.A. Style – Mary – Kate and Ashley : cut – rate Angel
Lauren Style – Ralph Lauren : white floral
Light Blue – Dolce & Gabbana : citrus “amber”
Light Blue pour Homme – Dolce & Gabbana : marine woody
Light Comes from Within – Creative Scentualization : soapy floral
Little Italy – Bond No. 9 : animalic Valencia
Lotos Blossom & Water Lily – Jo Malone : harsh floral
Loukhoum – Keiko Mecheri : powdery candy
Love in Black – Creed : iris cucumber
Love in white – Creed : burial wreath
Lulu – Fresh Scents by Terry : muguet musk
Lulu Guinness – Lulu Guiness : half pint
Lux – Mona di Oro : dire citrus
Lys – Parfums 06130 : marine citrus
M
Marc Jacobs Man – Marc Jacobs : sad fig
Mauboussin Homme – Mauboussin : woody oriental
Mayotte – Guerlain : nasty floral
Mechant Loup – L”Artisan Parfumeur : watery herbaceous
Mediterranean – Elizabeth Arden : fresh floral
Michael – Michael Kors : evil tuberose
Midnight Poison– Dior : woody oriental
Miel de Bois– Serge Lutens : animalic floral
Miss Boucheron – Boucheron : fruity floral
Miss Rocaille – Caron : sour peony
Miss Sixty –Coty : cheap candy
Montana Mood Sexy – Montana : not tonight
Montana Mood Soft – Montana : light oriental
Moragan de Toi – Moragan : penny candy
Must de Cartier – Cartier : Russian chocolate
My Dream – Gres : white floral
N
Nanette Lepore – Nanette Lepore : fruity death
New York Fling – Bond No. 9 : floral thingy
Nuit Noire – Mona di Orio : floral animalic
N.Y Chic – Mary-Kate and Ashly : grapefruit handsoap
O
Oh Baby – Fresh Scent by Terri : soap floral
Oiro – Mona di Orio : floral oriental
Omnia Green Jade – Bulgari : fruity musky
O Oui! – Lancome : overexposed floral
Original Santal – Creed : sweet oriental
Original Vetiver – Creed : unoriginal woody
P
Le Parfum – Lalique : rock bottom
Paris Hilton – Paris Hilton : silly floral
Pasha – Cartier: aromatic fougere
Passion –Elizabeth Taylor : fog horn
Pi – Givanchy : sweet nothing
Piegge a Filles – Ego Facto : disgusting musk
Pink Beach – Victoria’s Secret : canned fruit
Poeme – Lancome : horrid floral
Polo Black – Ralph Lauren : sage lavender
Polo Blue – Ralph Lauren : citrus woody
Pour Monsieur Concentre – Chanel : sweetened chypre
Princess – Vera Wang : tooth decay
Private Collection Amber Ylang Ylang – Estee Lauder : vanilla syrup
Provocative Woman – Elizabeth Arden : citrus floral
Pure Purple – Hugo Boss : cherry syrup
Pure Sport for Men – Benetton : no fragrance
Pure Sport for Woman – Benetton : undetectable floral
Purple Fantasy – Guerlain : citrus floral
Pursuit – Dunhill : spicy sporty
R
Reflection – Amouage : white floral
Reflection Man – Amouage : woody vanilla
Remix for Her – Armani : fruity floral
Rock’n Rose – Valentino : fruity floral
Romance Eau Fraiche 2008 – Ralph Lauren : watery lemons
Romance Man – Ralph Lauren : fresh nothing
Roots Spirit – Roots : citrus musk
Roots Spirit Man – Roots :woody citrus
Roughe –Hermes : floral oriental
Royal Bain de Caron – Caron : metallic fruity
RSVP – Kenneth Kole : woody amber
Reumeur – Lanvin : white floral
S
Sacre Coeur – Ego Facto : citrus herbal
Saks Fifth Avenue for Him – Bond No. 9 : woody amber
Sea and Sun in Cadaques– Salvador Dali : metallic grapefruit
Secret Obsession – Calvin Klein : fruity wood
Secret Wish – Anna Sui : fruity floral
Selection – Hugo Boss : powdery woody
Sentiment pour Homme – Escada : spicy woody
Serge Noire – Serge Lutens : camphor clove
Serpentine – Cavalli : fruity amber
Sexy Darling – Kylie Minogue+ : floral dreck
Shanghai Butterfly – Nanette Lepore : isopropyl alcohol
Sheer Stella 2007 – Stella McCartney: sour floral
Silver Mountain Water – Creed : fresh metallic
Silver Rain – La Prairie : Angel clone
Six Scents No.2 – Six Scents : blankety blank
Six Scents No. 4 – Six Scents : pine citrus
Six Scents No. 5 – Six Scents : pale stale
Six Scents No. 6 – Six Scents : chemical green
Soir de Lune – Sisley : woody rose
Spellbound – Estee Lauder : medicated treacle
Sport – Benetton : wet weekend
Starwalker – Mont Blanc : citrus woody
Sung – Alfred Sung : jasmine diaper
Sweet Paradise – Morgan : mango syrup
T
Tabac Blond – Caron : woody floral
Thundra – Profumum : sour patchouli
Tribute – Mary Kay : fruit bomb
Trouble – Boucheron : dismal oriental
Trouble Eau Legere – Boucheron : indigestible oriental
U
Ultraviolet – Paco Rabanne : medicinal fruity
Ultraviolet Man – Paco Rabanne : green sugary
United Colors of Benetton Man – Benetton : drone cologne
V
Valentino – Valentino : dire vanillic
Velocity – Mary Kay : fresh citrus
Velvet Rope – Apothia: fruity mess
Vent Vert – Balmain : green floral
Vera Wang for Man – Vera Wang : soapy nightmare
Versace Jeans Couture Man – Versace : woody nothing
Versace Man Eau Fraiche – Versace : screechy citrus
Versace pour Homme – Versace : laundry musk
Very Irresistible – Givenchy : woody floral
Very Irresistible for Man – Givenchy : fresh woody
Very Irresistibile Fresh Attitude – Givenchy : woody citrus
Very Irresistibile Sensual eau de parfum – Givenchy : woody floral
Very Sexy for Her – Victoris Secret : sour metallic
Very Sexy Hot – Victoris Secret : mango raincoat
Vetiver – Creed : not vetiver
Vetiver Extreme – Guerlain : vetiver disaster
Voile de Jasmin – Bulgari : floral wreck
W
White Red He – Armani : woody spicy
White Red She – Armani : fruity floral
White Rose – Floris : fake rose
Wish Pink Diamond – Chopard : cherry Baileys
Wish Turquoise Diamond – Chopard: phobic floral
Wisteria – Chantecaille : Windex actually
Z
Zoe – Fresh Scents by Terri : floral musk
NEW PERFUME GUIDE BY LUCA TURIN 2018 IS OUT!
Top 10 list of best perfumes that came out since the first book can be found HERE.
CHECK OUT NEW TOP LISTS BY LUCA TURIN AND TANIA SANCHEZ 2018
Top list of best perfumes rated with five stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of best perfumes rated with four stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of best perfumes rated with three stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of worst perfumes rated with two stars 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of worst perfumes rated with one star 2018 by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
CHECK OUT MORE TOP LISTS BY LUCA TURIN
Top list of best perfumes rated with five stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of best perfumes rated with four stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of best perfumes rated with three stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE.
Top list of worst perfumes rated with two stars by Luca Turin can be found HERE
MORE TOP LISTS BY FAMOUS PERFUME CRITICS
Top 10 list of best perfumes by Chandler Burr can be found HERE.
Top 100 list of best perfumes that marked XX century by Lizzie Ostrom can be found HERE.
DO YOU KNOW WHICH PERFUMES CELEBRITIES ACTUALLY WEAR?
Favorite fragrances of celebrities: Complete list can be found HERE. Find out what perfumes celebrities actually like to wear!
And if you want to find out what Creed perfumes celebrities like to wear check the best of HERE.
DO YOU AGREE WITH THE RATINGS? WHAT PERFUME WOULD YOU ADD TO THE LIST OR MAYBE REMOVE? LEAVE IN THE COMMENTS BELOW. I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO KNOW! KIND REGARDS, IGOR
I sent you a post and you did not respond. Are you sure you really want to know whether or not we agree as you stated? I disagreed with you and you seem to be uninterested or feel I am so off base that i am not even worthy of an email acknowledgment.
I stand behind the concept that there is a larger story behind Chanel Gardenia that indicates a soliflore or scent match wasn’t what they were going for. I also notice you left off the accent on the e in the name of this scent which is critical in fully comprehending the scent. It is GARDéNIA (gardén-ya). A fantasy white floral garden scent – never intended to smell just like gardenia.
This is so much better than a 1 star rating. I think you used a modern soliflore lens when handing out judgement. Just like we accept fantasy props, costumes, scenery from old silent films because they are of their time, Gardénia was a fantasy garden scent of its time. And despite viewing though that lens, I grade this scent as a timeless white flower bouquet that is worthy of the chanel label and worthy of wearing it for a variety of occasions – including a bridal choice or summer wedding guest. I also wear it to bed to envelope myself in gorgeous white flower petals and chanelinade.
Hi Jennifer,
This is the list from Luca Turin’s book. I’m sure you can find his contact on his blog about perfumes.
As for the star ratings, I think you have a valid point, Luca as well…it’s all about talking more about perfumes, expecting more from brands. So any comment made, I think, is made entirely out of mutual love for the world of perfumes.
I wish you all the best,
Kindest regards,
Igor
Thank you foryour reply, acknowledgment, and clarification. I misread and thought you were the author of these lists. (Facepalm) However, I was taking up your invitation to agree/disagree with which scents were on the lists.
Thanks for considering my point of view. I actually agree with much of the other Guerlain/Chanel assessments. But GARDèNIA, I shall have to agree to disagree with Luca. GARDèNIA is my European garden fantasy and Shalimar is my exotic Persian vacation garden fantasy. For me, the European garden wears well in Spring/Summer, while the Persian wears better in cooler seasons.
I really must protest your assignment of only one star to Chanel Gardénia. The concept if this fragrance was floral fantasy. “Gardénia was not conceived as, nor was it meant to be, a gardenia soliflore, although the heavy-smelling blossom was picked thanks to its optical resemblance to Mademoiselle Chanel’s favourite flower: the camelia, which doesn’t hold a scent. The name in reality derives from the English word “garden” (it’s jardin in French)”. http://perfumeshrine.blogspot.com/2011/02/chanel-gardenia-vintage-vs-les.html This is congruent with the story told by Chanel at their website and in other materials of theirs.
I infer that is why Chanel artfully ensures there is an accent over the e. It implies a different pronunciation and association with the word jardin/garden. This fragrance is meant to evoke a fantasy garden of white flowers much as Shalimar was a fantasy scent in the same decade.
This fragrance deserves to be viewed through the lens of its time. It is a beautiful Chanel scent and dries down on me to that delicious “chanelade” that is a thread running through their finest scents.
Chanel Gardénia smells like pungent pixie farts. Not that theres anything wrong with that. I have three frags, two have five stars and the third has one star yet the one star, Polo Black by far gets the most compliments. I actually hit the jackpot with a very attractive young female tattooist who called it hormones in a bottle, so dont take it too personally. Judging art is a purely subjective endeavour.
DO YOU AGREE WITH THE RATINGS? WHAT PERFUME WOULD YOU ADD TO THE LIST OR MAYBE REMOVE? LEAVE IN THE COMMENTS BELOW. I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO KNOW! KIND REGARDS, IGOR